The most uncomfortable thing imaginable is a hairless Mario

A horrible beast follows me in my dreams now.

Every night, I awake in terror, awash with sweat, heart pounding. I grip the bedding around me, trying to ground myself from the too-real horrors I just awoke from.

He's inside my head now, an image emblazoned on my conscience that I can never escape. A beast so familiar and yet a complete stranger, twisted by some sort of cruel instrument that has left him nothing but a dreadful shell of his former self.

It's-a-him, Shaved Mario.

Shaved Mario pic.twitter.com/JyfAHLC5oZ

— Brian Peppers (@november17) May 13, 2018

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